When have you experienced guilt? Read Psalm 90:8 and ask God to show you some of your secret sins.

I experienced guilt every time I see a lost soul wandering aimlessly around me. I really wanted to share the Gospel with them especially to the Malays but this country is a bit weird in her policies. We have the freedom of religion and are supposed to be able embrace any religion that we want (that’s the theory), plus evangelism to other faith but it is not happening here. Even if it does happen, it is done secretly.

I felt guilty whenever I heard Jesus’ command which is to go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit. My hands are tied. I felt guilty for something which is beyond my power. Is it really my fault?
I began to develop prejudice, suspicion and hatred towards those people who imposed this ridiculous law. I felt guilty over and over again when I see people died without having the chance to know who Jesus really is. In a broader context the failure to evangelize to my own people who have not yet accepted Christ also evoked guilt within me.

There are other personal things and secrets in my life that triggered the guilt in me. Some were done when I was in my secondary school; some were done against my parents (mostly). Whenever I think about those things in the past I will smile thinking how foolish I was. But then, came to realizing that it is possible for the mistakes to reoccur, I was afraid and came to the conclusion that I cannot runaway hiding from my sins unless I come to God and confess.

In Psalm 90:8, the psalmist stated that “You have set our iniquities before you, our secret sins in the light of your countenance” because he realized that all sin are seen in the eyes of God. As Adam had hid himself from God when he realized that he was naked, there is no way we can run from God’s judgment and will. In the end of the day, we still very much depend on His grace as we all have sinned and fall short of His glory (Romans 3:23).

This is the God that I serve, love and worship. I know how small and weak I am compared to His limitless power and glory. I can run, but I can’t hide. Lord, open my eyes that I may see my secret sins and repent. Transform me by the power of Your Holy Spirit. I want to be like You. Teach me to always do what is pleasing in Your sight. May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be always acceptable in Your sight. In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen.